I leave the country in three days for an undetermined amount of time. I’m working in France as a teacher until April, and then doing the same in Laos, with Maggie, for at least a year, but likely longer. This is the landmark I was holding my breath for in those last horrible days before Maggie left. I know being abroad and having my own adventures will make the fact that I’m not taking part in hers less bittersweet. Seven months is a long time, but then, she’s already been gone for three and a half and we get to see each other in just over one month.
We’re making it.
A friend asked me this week how the distance was going. I never know what to say to such questions. Do I say “good” because we haven’t broken up, haven’t grown into unlovably different people, haven’t annoyed one another or broken one another’s hearts with our silence? Do I say “terrible” because that’s so much of what it really is when the person you love is nearly as physically far away from you as another person can be? Do I say “amazing” because despite the distance, I can watch her fall asleep, comfort her through the difficult days, see photos and video of the places she’s falling in love with, “meet” her friends and talk to her most days?
I usually just tell the truth and say that it’s really hard, that I’ll be glad when it’s over, but that I know beyond the shadow of a doubt that I’m doing the right thing.
